Do you have these problems too?

I'm currently 15 years old and a boy. I have a lot of problems and just wanted to look for help so I'm here now.

I have big problems in my school to find friends or generally to communicate properly with my fellow human beings, but I managed to get two friends but I'm not happy because I know that I actually don't like these people at all and therefore myself have to adjust for them so that I don't always have to walk around the schoolyard alone. That was the main reason why I just lied to them. My problem is fundamental that I can't find a boyfriend or girlfriend because they either don't like me or they just find me strange. When I'm at home I also do a lot alone. I sit a lot in front of the computer and play some of my favorite games like Minecraft or something like that but never really with friends but I also feel almost no feelings. I know that I always want real friends but it doesn't make me sad but also not happy generally I assume that I have some emotion problem because I have never shown real emotions. My fellow human beings have already made me aware of this and from then on it became clear to me. I know I just wrote what came to my mind and maybe some things don't make sense but maybe someone understands that and can help me a little.

I'm also sorry I have LRS weak reading spelling.

That sounds like autism, google that otherwise maybe someone else can help you.

You make yourself small. Why? You just don't feel like superficiality. And because you "have to" adapt, you use people to do it for you. Find people who suit you. Who share your interests. You are bored to death. What do you think of? What do you enjoy and what do you need friends for? Maybe building a tree house, or building a kite… Or someone teaching you the guitar… Just ideas.

Leave people alone and don't use them. At some point, only you are the stupid one.

So I had the problem at that age too and to calm you down still. It is also difficult for me to find friends. Over the years you can always find someone who suits you. It's a lot of trying.

The time of finding. You have to be clear about what you actually want. Who you are and what expectations you have for yourself.

Unfortunately, emotions and feelings are now only digitized by the whole sch… Internet media and other communities so that you hardly get any direct personal reference to people.

Do a lot of what your interests are. Sport hobby other leisure activities. You get to know people who have the same interests and therefore already have one thing in common. Everything else is developing.

But I can reassure you that I'm still looking for myself just like you.

Okay at the moment I have to admit that leisure activities are somewhat limited by covid

Yes, it definitely makes sense what you write!

I think that's how many young people feel at your age. I was no different at the time. I felt lonely and felt quite lost.

As a teenager you really have to struggle with problems: you change yourself a lot, a lot is new, you just grow up slowly. It is not the same with parents as it used to be. Friendships get lost. You fall in love, often unhappily. It's really not easy.

The fact that others are doing the same - many, I would say - is probably of little help at the moment. Therefore, to your situation as you describe it.

Really good friends are rare. It can take a long time to find one. And not every friend is a really good friend. Friends can be closer to you (close friends) or maybe a little looser. The friends you describe may be the second - or are they just fellow sufferers? That can also be a one.

To find good friends, you have to be a good friend yourself. Are you a good friend Are you interested in your friends and their situation, what concerns them, their interests? Are you listening to them Do you show them that you like to be friends with them? In fact, with everything you miss, you can ask yourself whether you are giving it to others. I think that's a good start.

Gambling is of course fun and a nice pastime. However, as it sounds, you do it alone. You won't learn, to put it bluntly, how to deal with other people. Maybe you can look for a hobby where you are with others, talk, get to know new things. Yes, that's difficult right now given the Corona epidemic, but you could also look for chat partners your age. You can also get to know each other there.

Incidentally, I don't think you're unemotional. You're lonely, that's a pretty strong emotion. I think you're just trying to deal with all the clutter around you and blocking some things off, not letting them come to you. That is certainly not wrong, but if you block everything, nobody else will let you in on you.